My situation is a little different as my A (life-partner) has been sober for >20 years and was sober when I met her [we have some serious dry-drunk issues and, recently, a VERY big problem has developed around internet addiction -- gaming, not porn -- so that's why I'm here (and in al anon) but that's another story], but I do drink occasionally and we do have alcohol in the house. Because cooking and entertaining are very important to me and a big part of my life (both with her and before her) wine is probably the largest presence, but other stuff is available, too.
If I were in a situation where someone in the house were trying to get sober, I think it would be different. When my youngest sister was trying to get sober and for probably the first 18 mos to 2 years that she was sober we always tried not to have anything out and around whenever she was over. It just seemed fair and right not to subject her to what might be torturous and painful temptation. After awhile though she told us that we didn't need to do that anymore, so we stopped gradually and it has been fine.
I think the issue gets complicated when kids are involved, too. For my part, my parents always let us have a "taste" of whatever they were drinking (drinking was very rare for them -- once or twice a month, maybe) and as we got into our teens would let us have a small glass with a meal if they were doing so. Out of 7, we have 1 alcoholic. My partners parents, on the other hand, were/are both alcoholics but absolutely forbade their children to drink -- as a result, my partner and her brother were out getting smashed "secretly" by the time they were teens, and at this point, 3 out of 4 of them are alcoholics.
With my kids I have followed my parents approach (which has sometimes been a point of contention between my partner and I) because 1) being -- or being perceived as -- a hypocrite is something I absolulety try to avoid -- especially with kids because they can smell it a mile away and will use it as an excuse to totally write off anything and everything you say or do (and rightly so) and 2) because I think that making alcohol into something so "adult" and so powerful that they have to be protected from it by all kinds of prohibitions etc...just sets up a situation in which they are encouraged to give it more power than it might otherwise have over them and that's not something to which I want to contribute.
My feeling is that if I want the boys to behave well and responsibly around alcohol (or anything else) I have to both teach and model that behavior -- and demonizing alcohol, or instilling a spooky fear of its power, or setting up some kind of "adults only" secrecy around it would probably not be the best way for me to accomplish that.
freya
BTW: I do know that, even at this point, my partner is not going to want to kiss me if I've had anything to drink and that I cannot expect her to be the one to throw out what's left of a bottle of wine -- even if it's been in the fridge for a week and tastes like crap -- even after 20+ years she will try to convince me to drink it rather than throw it away because somewhere deep inside she still has that feeling about how precious it is! YUK! YUK! YUK! -- I guess I wouldn't make a very good alcoholic!