I live in San Francisco and actually go to AA meetings now that I am more recovered and more over the men stuff. I also go to all female meetings. The AA groups are actually quite clicky though and now the irony is that I find it easier to penetrate the coed groups than the all-female groups because for some reason I had a really hard time breaking the ice with the all-female group. With the men, they approach me at least, it does make it easier. But still San Francisco AA meetings have a closed vibe. I went to an AA meeting in Hawaii and that was the best one I have ever been to, not in terms of the shares, but in terms of how damn nice and open everyone was, and the fact that it was outside under a Banyan tree. I must admit that sometimes I do get slightly jealous of fellowship but again I am finding it hard to penetrate. It actually was the topic of people's shares the other night at this huge, too-cool-for-school saturday night meeting. But my actual point was that there are tons of resources here.
Anyways, there are lots of Buddhist recovery events in SF. There is even a year long Buddhist recovery Sangha class/group. Kevin Griffin, the author of One Breath at a Time is speaking a block from my house in a month on the 12th step I think. So I am actually pretty into that stuff.