Just asked my AH to leave, he is SOOO mad. I had set specific boundaries in place last week and he just ran them over with a MACK truck. One of my boundaries was that I would allow him to stay at home as long he attend three NA or AA meetings per week as well as saw his therapist once a week. Also, I said if I felt uncomfortable or suspicious of his use at all and if I felt that he was not being honest with me, he was out. Of course now, I am a "spoiled brat " and all I do is check up on him and I drive him crazy and he can't wait to get a divorce (he told me to go see a lawyer TODAY) and he will finally be happy when he is away from me. That it doesn't matter if he uses or not, we don't get along anyway etc. etc. etc. Addict talk I know, but it still hurts my feelings.
My birthday was Friday and he had over $150.00 that he took out of his paycheck for my present. Not to mention, he took additional $40.00 out of our account on Thursday..so that equals $190.00 right?!? Well, he spent around $80.00 on my gift and bought cigarettes ($10.00), $10.00 in gas, and $10.00 for a Burger King dinner.. that only equals $110.00... so that means there is over $80.00 left... and he can't seem to come up with a story about what happened to it... apparently it just mysteriously disappeared? Last time I checked $80.00 was enough to buy COCAINE!!! I would understand if he misplaced $20.00 or $30.00 but $80.00?!? Come on!! Even if he had went to the "gas station" like he said he did Friday night (at 11:00 P.M.) he would still have at least $60-$70 left!! He went to the "gas station" to get candy but brought nothing back-hummmm... Of course, there is still that little annoying piece of me that second guesses myself.. BUT COME ON!!! SERIOUSLY!!?!? Why does addiction make you DUMB?!?!?
He was also supposed to go a AA meeting last night...well he came home and told me it was a good meeting. Found out this morning on accident that he didn't go. My Mother In Law talked to her friend whose husband attends and she said her husband didn't go to the AA meeting last night because of strong thunderstorms, a tree fell in their driveway. Problem being, my AH said he was there. So, my AH is lying about money, drugs and going to meetings but somehow I am the jerk?!?! Did I miss something?
It is so frustrating to know I am right and all he does is spit diarrhea out of his mouth! I hate it when he makes me feel like I am the reason he uses
. I know this is all addict behavior but it still sucks. I just know the next few days are going to be horrible and I am going to want to let him back in when he gets in his "sorry" phase and promises to never do it again.. HELP ME BE STRONG!! I am sticking to my boundaries this time, if not for me, for my beautiful little 3 month old baby!