thanks guys.. I'll type more another time. He feels awful, claims he was just being stupid and drunk. I dunno. I was stupid and drunk a lot of times, but still hurts me.
Suz, I guess I am pissed that he got drunk because I had to get up in the middle of the night to pick him up when he said he was going to go and have a beer or two. Because he was drunk and acting ridiculous and it just made me mad that after I spent all day throwing that bbq for HIS brother and family, he still wakes me in the middle of the night because he can't be responsible. I feel like a total hypocrite because of how badly I've behaved, but wtf, what if I had an emergency with this pregnancy or something. I expect him to be responsible all the time I guess. All those "what ifs" in my head. I think I have seen him drunk like 3 times in the past year.. so it freaks me out kinda when it happens.
We're better than we've ever been, and I know it's when little things like this pop up that I get so bent out of shape about it. We used to do this crap all the time, and now that it never happens, I think it effects me more.. plus hormones cause a lot of emotional craziness for me.