I'm also so sorry that you have to go through this. It is a terrible situation but seeing that you are being smart and trying to get your own life is great!
I too am on the road to detachment, I care about my XABF a lot but unlike before now I am not sexually attracted to him. Whenever I see him in his drunken state I feel completely turned off, its something automatic that clicks in my head when he's drunk I think about the life that I want, the relationship that I want and the man that I need and looking at him he is not it. I love him but not the way I did before. I do believe that its possible to fall out of love but it all depends on you.
Never blame yourself for his sadness! Being an alcoholic is living in depression and as happy as they might seem while taking that shot they aren't. Its a hell that they don't know how to escape. No matter what you do he will continue, look back to the times where you did have sex with him and gave cuddly time. Did it change anything? Did he stop being an alcoholic? No.
Its a disease and the best thing that you could do is continue to focus on you.
Good luck... I wish you the best.
