Good for you Kel. Keep on the track you're on. Just remember that the people at the rape crisis center have heard stories like yours thousands of times and they will not judge you, but empathize with your pain and support you. They're likely going to tell you did the right things and help you treat your PTSD. I'd still suggest asking your therapist about EMDR. While I feel J should spend some time in jail, I support you in your reason not to press charges. He may do this again, but that's not your fault and is out of your hands. You didn't create the monster. I think he needed to be told you lost your love for him so he can let go and move on, though he might spiral down for a while. I am curious why valium, an addictive drug, would be a part of the plan B for someone with a codeine addiction? There's plenty of non-addicting medications like trazedone that knock you out just the same, and it's an anti-depressant. It seems like taking valium, a depressant, would make your condition worse. But I'm not a doctor so I'll just shut up. :-)
Do you have Narcotics Anonymous meetings where you live? If you do I'd recommend going to one to get more help from others, in person, for how to treat your drug addiction. Though that will never end until you treat your PTSD which, from what I have heard, can be a slow process. But you've already got such a good head on your shoulders you're ahead of the game.
Good luck and take care