I have no idea what to do
I have to make a really tough decision in the next couple of days and I have no idea what to do. And of course the decision is mine to make with no help from my AH since he has no part in the kids lives. I have to decide weather to split my kids up, I get the 2 boys and my parents take permant custody of my oldest who is my daughter. Or Take all 3 kids. Why is this such a hard decision? There are many reasons. My daughter has sever emotional problems and acts out by seeking out and hurting her brothers severly. She also lies to everyone. Not little lies huge ones that can cause the children to be removed by social services. She destroys property and her own possesions. My oldest son also has ADHD and color blindness. He is only 4 so is having a hard time dealing with all of the stuff happening.
For safety reason it hsa been suggested to split them up. At least for a while. This way my daughter can get the one on one care she needs and supervision and structure she needs and the boys do not learn from her example and also are safe and my oldest son can get more care and attention that he needs.
I am going to be a single mom either way. My heart aches to have all of them home. I love all my kids. But everyone is telling me I need to look at the big picture. I need to do what is best for them since I obviously have failed them when it came to protecting them from my AH. I want to make the right decision.
Why am I always the responsible one? Why do I have to make all the hard life changing decisions? Why do the addicts get to make an exit to do as they please with no responsibility? I love my kids> I don't want to hurt any of them. I want them to have the best life possible. I am so lost.