Originally Posted by
28Days 
When he's with me, he wants to quit. He wants to be sober and be everything I need. When he leaves me though, and he's with his friends or alone, he "realizes" he doesn't want to quit.
Been there, done that. She actually said "I don't get it. When we are together things are great, but on the phone or when we are apart everything goes bad". Yeah, well that is because when she is away she becomes irresponsible and is with people who don’t care about anything but themselves and their drugs. They allow each other to enable each other and life is good. Yet, it’s not, and when they come down, or get away from for a while by being with clean and healthy people they see it, and want it to stop. The habit, and draw of the addiction is too strong though and no matter how much we love them, try to meet their needs, and make them happy, we just cannot take the pain or struggles they are masking away like the weed or the DOC can. I have been on and off with this for 4 years now. It is not a fun ride.
Oh, and I don't think he wants/is willing to "lose you" because of it. I am sure he wants you more. It's just that the addiciton is too powerful for him to control and it will win over everytime. In the end it doesn't matter why, either way we lose out (so do they). It kills me a little more each time I go thru it.