Jazzman

Couple things I would like to comment on, maybe it will help.

I've learned it can take up to 6 months for a recovering As brain chemistry to return to normal. And a recovering cocaine addicts brain chemistry imbalance can take up to up to two years (that was my experience). This means that seratonin and dopamine levels are so out of whack that when receiving seemingly happy news like a job promotion of your childs straight A report card, the reaction is muted and less than exciting. An overall numbness to feelings, and I have experienced this for myself, it does happen. Add to that the ADs and all bets are off, completely unpredictable return to a balanced brain chemistry. Too often ADs are prescribed to alleviate a temporary situational stress problem and not to treat a true brain chemistry imbalance.

As far as the intimacy goes... Do you really want negotiated gratuitous guilt sex? Or would you rather make love to your wife who wants to make love to you? If your answer is the later, then you will need to learn patience. If you answer is not the later then you will probably get what you are asking for, but at the price of your marriage and long term happiness.

I once tried to negotiate gratuitous sex from my 1st wife, it sucked, wasn't at all satisfying, made me feel like a thief and I'll never do that again. If I'm ever again in a relationship in that much trouble I would bail first.