New here
First I want to say, I am an alcoholic married to an alcoholic.
I am getting help and trying to gain sobriety.
My husband of 25 years is not.
Over the weekend, my adult children told me that they no longer care about him, that they have no relationship with him, and that I should stop trying to help him, and focus on myself.
On Friday's he goes to the bar. Every Friday is a nightmare. This Friday he went and for some reason came home early like 6 p.m. He ate with us and then started to say that he wanted me to go out with him on his motorcyle. I refused. I told him I would NEVER go on the bike with him if he had even one drink, he told me he was going out. I told him if he took the bike (which he had an accident on less then a month ago) I would call the police, call the bar, and call the insurance company. He walked to the bar and came home after 4 a.m.
He has repeatedly told me that he does not love me, we have not been intimate in over a year. He says it is because I am fat, and if I lost weight we would be ok, which is ridiculous.
I started drinking about 4 years ago, after a masectomy and the death of two of my siblings, I drank to forget, and when I stopped, I realized it didn't bring them back, and didn't help me to forget, everything is still there, except my breasts, which are never coming back
My dilema is this, he won't leave. I can't leave. Should I focus on my own sobriety so that I am strong enough to leave him? How do I deal with the Friday situation.
Anything you can say to help, is appreciated.