Please read my most recent threads I posted--a lot of good wisdom on there.
He broke his promise to you, and what are the consequences? What are YOUR boundaries?
Someone said something in one of my posts about how if I leave the keys in the ignition, then get mad when someone comes in and crashes my car, whom do I really have to blame?
My xabf promised not to do coke over and over again. I let him have 2 chances, after he "messed up" and did it, despite his promise. The second time, he told me he only did coke when drinking, and that it was because of his drinking problem, and he guilted me into staying with him and promised he'd get help.
I had to come up with some quantifiable way he could prove to me he was serious, so I said, stay sober for 30 days. I made him promise this. Well, he lasted 3 weeks.
In order to keep my self-respect, I HAD to leave. This was a firm, no negotiation, no wiggle room BOUNDARY I had set, for my own sanity so I would know when to leave or stay. His inability to keep his promise was my signal to bail.
Yeah, you shouldn't kick him out til you're ready, but I have to ask...why are you NOT ready???
Originally Posted by
whyamistaying 
Well the reason I don't want to react is that what is the point? I say you are drinking again and you promised you'd stop. Then what? I have to be ready to kick him out and I want to be ready. I'm just not.
So if I bring it up and then it turns into a fight, isn't that playing into the whole problem?