This thread is way too close to reality for me but only you know what's going on inside of you. I don't think you can rely on others to make that call.
My husband made comments about me always drinking at night (had no idea how much I drank if I got home earlier than him after a rough day or after he went to bed)... years ago he threatened to leave me (before marriage) because I would get slap happy when I drank, but it wasn't malicious... I was just joking around and I stopped as soon as he indicated the problem and said he wished to dump all of the alcohol in the apartment. It was very real to him but when I told him awhile after that... years after that, like just a few nights ago that I read on a chart that I was considered a "heavy drinker" he said "so what, you like wine, just have one glass. It's good for you." I took that one glass and turned it into 3.
After only 4 years of marriage, I have learned these 2 things.
1. Most men don't notice very much! I love my husband to death and we spend TONS of time together, but I would have to be passed out on the floor day after day for my husband to think I had a drinking problem.
The more used to alcohol you get, the less you will show it often times. I just learned that it is more of the alcohol abusers, not alcoholics that show the extreme outward signs because alcoholics are used to that level in their system.
2. I'm lucky I'm not a very emotional person because men seem to be much more physical in nature... you may have noticed that as well. It's common sense maybe. We women often spend time analyzing what is going on in our lives, worrying about it, thinking there may be a problem etc and I think it takes something on a greater scale for most men to acknowledge a problem. No offense guys. It's not a bad thing.
Quit for yourself. Drinking doesn't consume my life because when I do it, I don't go out to bars/clubs, I multitask. I do productive things when I drink. I go online, I clean, I garden. I'm not sure I'm ready either. I'm already planning the 4th, going up 9 hours to visit family for a party and debating what I will drink with all of that alcohol... free, unlimited alcohol.
My goal is to last until that point and maybe overall, that isn't good but it is much better than what I would do if I didn't set that goal. Good luck to you even if this is a slow quest.