Hi! I'm 27 so I just fit in.
I started drinking when I was 18. I remember back to the very first time I had a drink, at my schools final party, formal, prom. Someone got me a vodka and oj and I loved it. I couldn't taste the alcohol in it and downed one after another. I love the feeling it was giving me. I felt so relaxed, happy and felt like I could talk to anyone. ( I was the *shy* girl in highschool ). I thought to myself I have finally found the secret to feeling confident and happy. I ended up drinking WAY to much and spent most of that night and the next day in the toilet :dead1: . I hated the way the alcohol made me feel so sick so I gave up on the idea. I probably didn't drink for a few weeks after that but the next time I did I downed a bottle of wine and again felt great the time, socialable and happy. Same thing happened, spent the night in the toilet. After these two incidents I travelled overseas for a year to travel abroad and work. My drinking became a regular occourance during that time. I drank every weekend to excess but I never drank alone, it was always with friends. Over the next few years my drinking continued along the sameway. I would only drink on the weekends with friends but looking back I realise it was a problem back then because whilst my friends always knew when I stop I didn't and would always be the *drunk* one who ended up in the bathroom.
I travelled to the US when I was 23 to do au pairing for a year and found the social life over there to be fantastic! I loved it, and was drinking every weekend there as well. One thing I began to notice is that I was starting to become tolerate to the alcohol and was no longer getting hangovers. I thought this was great! It was when I was in the US that I started to drink during the week. After a long day with the kids I would feel really stressed and liked nothing better than a few drinks. So this is when I began to drink alone in my bedroom. To cut a long story short I used any excuse to have a drink. Favourite tv show on? Have a drink! Fav movie on? Have a drink, and so on and so on.
I came back from the US a year later and my drinking continued like that till about a year ago. Slowely I began to drink more and more during the week till I was drinking every night. I started to realise that I have a problem and need to do something about it. I went to a few AA meetings, didn't feel they were right for me. I would stop drinking for a week and then find myself back to my old bad habbits. Finally I started developing physical problems, like I would wake up feeling really shaky, my heart beat would be beating REALLY fast. I knew this was not right. I finally developed a serious stomach ulcer and this hit home. I realised that it was a direct result of my drinking and knew I had to stop. I was put on meds for the ulcer and was told that I was not allowed to drink whilst on the meds so that was a good head start. That first few days was hell, but after about a week I started to feel great. I have now been sober for 19 days and am feeling wonderful. The depression and sucidal thoughts I was starting to get are gone and I feel really engergised and happy. I plan on going to AA meetings again because this time I am serious, I do NOT WANT TO GO BACK TO THAT HELL AGAIN.
Whilst I have never had a dui, never been to jail, never lost a job from the alcohol I know that it was only a matter of time. I'm glad I stopped drinking before any of that happened. I'm glad I finally have my life back.