I think this is where alot of us women get caught up in the "relationship" and ultimately lose ourselves. That is my perspective. That is where I saw myself going off into the deep end. His problems became mine (more then they were his) I was doing and fixing and making things happen. This took a toll on myself. Caused resentments and anger.
With those feelings they brought in the need to feel "needed" to make the anger and resentment go away.
It wasnt until I stepped back and really looked at myself that I realized all of this. We are women who are beautiful, kind, caring, loyal creatures and we should be honoring ourselves and not other people.
If you live your own life and feel your own feelings (instead of someone "making" you feel a certain way) when things like what happened to you wont be such a big deal. You realize it was them and not you and you go on with the confidence of that knowledge......