Suspicious, we are both in exactly the same position, it seems. It rings SOOO true what you say about distrust being equally as harmful to a marriage as a relapse. We both need to continue to keep busy, as you say, and worry about ourselves and not our husbands. It's so hard when trying to voice concerns to family members and friends who have not been through this. Comforting to know that others do understand and know exactly what I am talking about! Hang in there, Suspicious, and I will do the same! Thanks for your post.