Sending comfort your way, Mis.
It is painful. And it is true that you cannot trust, when addiction is involved.
My prayer for you is that your life becomes a little wider, the door a bit more open, so that loving, trustworthy people are the constant in your life, no matter how many addicts are orbiting around you.
The world is filled with people who will not hurt you. When you begin to recover from the effects addicted people have had on your life, you will begin to find more and more loving, stable people.
Have you found an Al-Anon meeting you like?
Someone once said,
"It's not what the addict does that will make or break you. It's what you do."
So, good luck, sweetie, as you start your journey to find love and trust. Everyone here will support you every step of the way.