I'm not sure you're in relapse mode, Tan, but you're wise to be cautious.
What natural methods have you applied to help your anxiety? I know you had been doing yoga and exercising - are you still doing these things? What about meditation/prayer?
I've never had a true panic attack, despite a history of benzo abuse. I'm not sure what I would do in your situation. Would I take the pill, if all else failed? Hard to say from my current vantage point.
If you are thinking of them a lot, and looking forward to taking them at night, I would suggest that is a warning sign right there.
It's your decision, Tan, and I'll support you whatever you decide to do.
Hugs.