christin1225

Jane, thanks! My current doctor schedules 10-minute visits. He doesn't listen. I have an appointment with him this week, but an appointment with another doctor next week (who may not take me, so I don't dare tick off my current doctor).

I've spoken with the nurse of the new doctor and if he accepts me (his practice is part-time), he has his patients keep a daily journal and his patients bring the journal in and he discusses what's been happening on a daily basis. The appointments average 20-30 minutes. Everyone is scheduled for 30 minutes. I can't imagine that level of care! And he'll bill my insurance (the same amount of money per visit as my current doctor charges).

I'm trying to be patient until I see the new doctor. I'm really afraid that my current doc might drop me if I put up too much of a fuss. He knew that anxiety was what led me to taking the pills and had prescribed something at the first visit. But, I had hallucinations from it (it was a medicine used for schizophrenia which is actually an opiate uptate blocker!!) He has never prescribed anything since. It was like, "Well, if you didn't like what I prescribed the first time. Oh well.) Maybe he doesn't know any non-addictive meds.

Anyway, all that's okay now that I have another doctor in the works. I don't feel so trapped. I was really frustrated before. But, I forget easily and the longer that it gets from my previous visit, the more guilty I feel for looking for another doctor. But, each time that happened, I have my visit, need to discuss something and can't, and leave frustrated.

I took an extra 2mg on Friday night. Even though I was still sick on Saturday, it wasn't nearly as bad as Thursday or Friday nor was the anxiety as bad. So, I stuck to 6mg yesterday and will again today. I'm still afraid to eat, though.

It's been suggested that I metabolize Sub differently/quickly. I met another girl in IOP who had some of the same problems as I had with it in the beginning. I've read stories about how Sub has "turned" on people after a year or more of of using. Some of what I have already experienced has resembled those stories.

I thank everyone for being here for me (especially since this is primarily Jimba's thread). I've really been hijacking it lately and the fact that he doesn't mind is a testament to how great of a guy he is!

How are you doing today, Jimba?

Don... oh I wish that I could do it totally the way that you did. I admire you so much! I don't know much self-control I could have with Ativan. Thanks for sticking with me.