Originally Posted by
Relief 
I managed to stay sober for all of six days. I honestly believe I am losin my mind. Why do I keep drinking poison when I know what the outcome will be. I am lost.
I have used every resource I know except aa, so this morning I am going to my first meeting. I'm not scared or nervous because I am too tired for those emotions.
Please send good thoughts my way because I need them.
Hey Relief, it's great to see you here posting. Congratulations on your six days clean, and your desire to attend meetings. An answer to your question of why you keep drinking poison when you know what the outcome will be is because of addiction. The addicted brain keeps saying GO, when your common sense tells you not to. Addiction is a mental obsession. You seem to be doing all the right things to stop. Only you can control if you put a drink in your body or not. AA is a wonderful program with alot of support. Recovery is possible. You have to want it, and work for it. It's possible. Your on the right track. Keep moving forward.