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Old 03-30-2009, 11:16 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
sfgirl
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 679
I don't do AA but I personally don't really think you or I am "fixed" in 58 days (congrats by the way). While I completely understand not wanting to do AA forever and ever, I think it still is pretty early to walk away. Unless of course you feel that AA is not for you and you want to work on your recovery in a different way, but two things come to mind:

1. Cravings aren't predictable or workable. I used to think that cravings were a product of "working a good program." And that if I really got the message through my system then they would be a thing of the past. The funny thing is they can sneak up on you even when you are doing everything right, at least they have on me. At month three and four it was easy, no cravings, but then wham around month five they hit me pretty hard for almost two weeks. That humbled me a lot and made me realize that cravings will be something that will come, that I cannot banish no matter how much work I put in and are about as predictable as the stock market is right now.

2. AA and/or recovery isn't only about drinking so even if the cravings are gone that doesn't mean that there isn't work left. I am six months in and I feel like I am still at the bottom, climbing up a mountain. I basically feel like I grew up on alcohol, it was my best friend and parent and now I have to relearn life. It is not a quick process. While I am sure the process is different for everyone, what I am certain of is that deep change does not happen quickly no matter how much I have wanted it to. (I also have another theory about addicts' concept of time and results— we like everything and are used to everything happening quickly and in recovery we have to get used to everything happening much more slowly)

But all these are things that you have to decide for yourself and for your own needs. You can always quit going to AA a year down the road. But my advice to you, from another newcomer, is hang around and listen to some more stories.
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