She earns nothing money wise. I all too often hear that taking care of the baby entitles her to half of everything because it is a job.
You did however hit the nail on the head, she does have free access to the money because I do not want the arguement as the arguement does affect my ability to actually do some work and earn money. I have already lost my overall stature and finances (never meant much to me anyway, I don't pat myself on the back for getting a promotion or raise - I really do enjoy the work)
I am hearing an overall theme though from all responders and I thank-you...self. I will sleep on it (stuck in the spare room with the computer for now listening for little one to wake up for bottle) and deal with it tomorrow.
To Thine Own Self Be True, I really hope that during your steps to recovery you didn't have to lose too much but am glad to here you are still in recovery. Kids are great.