Hello, everyone. I'm checking in.
I've been seeing a therapist. Only two sessions so far, but at least she is really easy to talk to. She really wants to get me on an SSRI, but I have to quit drinking first. My PCP knows I have a history of drinking and as a result is loath to prescribe me meds. I'm going to quit before I go to my next appointment in a couple of weeks and I'll tell my therapist that if my PCP doesn’t give me a chance, then he is advocating/encouraging slow suicide. I will not play games. I’m at my breaking point. I am done. This works or nothing will.
I have proven that I can be sober for limited periods of time. The longest I made it was 80 days and that's more than enough time for any medication to take effect. I need something.
I never suggested medication to the therapist. The first session she asked me why I wasn’t on anything (and she knew about my drinking). I told her I dropped the bomb on my PCP about one week beforehand and I didn’t feel comfortable telling him my problems. That’s not his area of expertise, anyway.
I’ll see how this goes.