Morning all
Happy Saturday! I LOVE Saturdays, and now hubby is back to work, I have the whole day to myself.. sometimes that's nice, especially now that I don't spend it sipping on vodka, killing a hangover, maintaining a disgusting buzz.. boy does that sound gross right now.
Have counseling at 10:45, kinda nervous about that.. He saw me at such a raw and vulnerable state on Wednesday as you guys know, we'll see, maybe I'll ask him to do some guided relaxation. Not sure how therapeutic it is but it feels good!
Suzi, my 'openess' here and elsewhere comes in waves. Sometimes I feel like I share too much, sometimes I type and type here and delete and just lurk. There's so much growth happening inside of us, I truly believe that.. and sometimes it's a big jumbled, scary, confusing, exciting, etc.. My emotions are pretty rollercoasterish, it's so screwed up, sometimes I'll 'catch' myself feeling SO excited about life, giddy even, and something in me totally crashes the party and brings me down and tells me otherwise. I shut down sometimes too. Maybe, if you find it helpful to really open up and be 'you', start a private online journal. I've thought of it.. usually when I'm upset or something intense.. that I want to put things out there, but not for anyone to read, but just to get them out of me. I hope you feel safe here with what you share, I love knowing about you and your life and how you're doing day to day.
Warren, I'm happy for you that you're so busy! It's so hard out there economy wise, I am so blessed and thankful that I have my job, plus it's a kick ass job! It's scary out there.. and you're on the cusp (it seems... you're sooo private sometimes) of some very great and exciting things, and I thank you for sharing what you can here. Your excitement about your project is contagious.. makes me want to DO something new. Thank you!
Lisa, your post kinda hit home for me in a few ways.. just thinking of the bratty teenager/early 20'sager I was, how my parents must have felt watching me go down a crazy path, helpless.. You can only do what you can, you're right, she IS an adult now, and I hope she makes more good choices than bad.. we all get our hands dirty, and we learn. Some of us learn early, some of us still are..
Charles, I hope the counseling thing goes well. My therapist is a psychologist, classically trained in cognitive behavioral therapy, relaxation therapy and addictions counseling. I lucked out. I think the one frustration I've had in counseling in SOME sessions is that I feel like I'm just talking just to talk, with a lot of "mmhmm"s and "ok.." from him. At first my head was screaming "OK I just poured my heart out, tell me what to do!" lol.. that's not their job. I'm educated as a counselor, I know this already, but if anything else on those days (like I found on Wednesday), even just hearing myself talk can be hugely therapuetic. My sessions are 45 minutes.. sometimes I come home and i'm still processing, and I write it out, or spend some quiet time by myself to keep thinking of everything I've just pried open in my heart and my head and reflect. Keep notes for next time. Journal.. A counselor is just one of many guides in life, they just have more specific training on it. People come in and out of our lives all the time, it's interesting to think about why they are there, you never know.. could be the most important person in that moment, in your life.
wow... I just typed a lot !
Tennis, lurk away, but share with us sometime!
Phal, thank you for giving me a little window into phal world
Where's Dori? miss you!
Ok, off to "shoot" my dog (with insulin..). I'll be around later. Sorry that was a horrifically long post! See what I can do with more free time on the weekends!
