Thanks again for your posts! I really do want my marriage to work, I think deep down he does too... but like Ago said the fabric of our relationship has changed and I guess we need to learn how we fit together now.
IO said "..but maybe you just don't even know what you feel anymore", that really hit the nail on the head. Sometimes I feel guilty when I work on me (the codie in me just wants to focus on him). It is hard to remember that I am responsible for MY happiness and not rely on him to make me happy.
I don't particularly like the alanon meetings, I feel I get way more out of SR and I can't say it enough... THANK YOU for all of the support and love (even if it is tough love)
that is given here, it really does help. For every 1 member here I'm sure there are 10 "lurkers" like me that may not post but get so much from those who do.
Another question... does "fake it to you make it" really work? In other words, if I preted (for lack of a better word) that I have the June Cleaver marriage will it become a self fulling prophecy and actually happen eventually?