Hello and welcome.
I can relate to u and ur
story....however i am the
one in recovery and my
spouse then didnt see a
need for one....
He didnt have a problem
with drug nor alcohol...
just a normal hard working
man admired by many.
The emotions, imtimacy,
communication ...all that u
mentioned above was sparce
as well in our 25 yr marriage.
I had a program and he went
to alanon once to pick up
the word detatchment.
I didnt want detatchment...
i needed someone to give me
that unconditional love....all
the things needed in a relationship
or family that was destroyed from
me during my abusive childood.
My mom drank with prescription
meds which made her a Dr. Jeckle/
Mr. Hyde personality.
I had been looking for love in all
the wrong things but thought
i had it whe i married the first
time....
Anyway....my husband and i
separated and i moved back
to my home town and just
recently remarried to a wonderful
man that is also in recovery.
The only thing i can say is....
My HP brought us together. He
has been there throughtout my
entire life even when i wondered
if He really was....I had to remember
that all things happen in His time
and not mine.....
There were long periods of unhappiness
however today i understand why.....
Things had to happen as they were
ment to happen and today is
unbelieveable......
The man i married is all that i have
been looking for all my life. The house
i moved in is now my home fillled
with love, care, understanding, trust
and honesty.
For a note of optomism....there r
couples where both are in a program.
One spouse in AA the other Alanon.
They are supportive of each other,
where neither one works the others
program.....they each attend each
others meetings together,,,,,which
is inspiring.....so there is hope to stay
married till death do u part if u both
are willling to work together.
Thanks for letting me share.