Callie -
I am so sorry. It really wasn't fair to be jealous of you. I have read every thread of yours this morning after my meeting. Wow. So many similarities. AW started with percocet proceeded to fentanyl, dilaudid, and morphine before she was done. She was miserable. She has attempted suicide. I just didn't know what was driving the drama until the day we sent her to rehab. Now I have been questioning every moment of the last 12 years.
Freedom 1990, KJ and Sue -
Thanks - Ya'll are so right. Logically I see it. I know my AW in her selfishness has accidently given me the best present she ever has - freedom from her drama and damage. She has given up so much in my opinion, but she has no regrets - she is happier now than ever in her life. (According to the only update to the ILs)
I would still reconcile. The emotional pull is too strong. I was blindsided by her withdrawl, I am impatient or should that be inpatient regarding her.
Me - I struggle to find the driving force to propel me through the divorce process. The AW called the day after she moved out and told me that she didn't have enough money left for a lawyer, so if I would put everything together with mine she would just sign it, as long as she got the MB. Part of me wants to stop cleaning up her messes and just say forget it, but what happens to me later when I finally get over her and meet someone decent.
Callie - I know it wasn't fair to pick you out, but I wish my AW would've given me a chance. (Pretty selfish for a codee huh?)
To all - The kids are hers not ours together. They moved with her. I have damaged our relationship enough trying to save them from their future. My last recover relapse was caused by the sD moving out of the AW. She just moved back last night.