MsPINKAcres

Had a lengthy visit with my atty yesterday. Prepared our response to ex's request for spousal support and all the other things he is requesting in the divorce.

My atty knows the entire history of our marriage. Knows ex has alcohol/drug problem and that he is not sober right now.

In order to fight this - He stated the reason ex doesn't have a job is due to alcohol/drug problem and refusal to work. This is the truth.

BUT - geez there is always a BUT right?

I am a devoted member of Al-Anon. I believe in and am committed to working the Steps and Traditions in my recovery and in all aspects of my life.

So today I am struggling with Tradition 11. The sentence that states
"We need guard with special care the anonymity of all AA members."

As far as my ex is concerned - I could really care less about him - but what I do care about is my program and my spiritual well-being.

Am I doing the Next Right Thing for me?

I know that he basically threw the 1st punch with what he is asking for, but am I using that to justify me using any action to get what I want?

I have a great respect for AA and the members who truly use this program to fight the disease of alcoholism/addiction. I know that at some times in his life this program has helped my ex maintain sobriety - but not on a consistant basis. Does that relieve me from protecting his anonymity?

No where in the papers does it say he is a failed member of AA - it just says that he has an alcohol/drug problem and because of that he doesn't work on a regular basis, therefore I should not be responsible for supporting him.

I just wonder am I working the rules to my favor and ignoring the Traditions?

What's done is done. But I am still a little tormented by this. Not so much as how it will affect him, (not at all how it will affect him) but as to how it will affect my recovery and how I affect the healthiness of my home group and the programs of Al-Anon and AA.

Any thoughts?