First Timer Here... Intro and Question
Hello all,
I am brand new to this site. I have been looking for someone/somewhere to go to find information and support as I navigate my babydaddy's struggle with alcohol and depression. There were so many flags and warnings from the very beginning, but I just didn't get it. I feel SO stupid. I apologize if I sound crazy. I'm feeling emotionally deflated today. Tough love is...well... tough. I'm vacillating between feeling relieved to have him out of my house tonight and guilty, because I know he has no place to go and very little pocket money (been unemployed for nearly a year, and is probably down to the last $20 of his unemployment).
I just wanted to tell you all how much I appreciate finding this site and reading your posts, and feeling like there might be a place where I can go to talk freely about my situation, without judgment. My friends all think it is simple thing to toss this man under the bus. I am struggling with tough love... and feeling guilty for being so tough. I love the sober man, not the drunk guy. And besides the usual sh*t that comes with this behavior, we have a child with developmental challenges who loves her daddy. It is heartbreaking for me on so many levels, but I can't allow the unacceptable behavior to bring her and I down. Up until he came back into our lives, I was supporting the two of us just fine.
To his credit, this past weekend he opted to go into Rehab through the VA, but it appears they are slow in getting him into a residential home??? I called his doctor today and she would not tell me the process. A 10 day wait to get an interview to determine if you qualify for a bed, when you are telling them you are ready to go now and commit?? Now he is spending his time sitting in my house getting more and more anxious, thus drinking while he waits for the rehab placement? I couldn't take it.
I have felt so trapped so long. I didn't think I wanted to talk... but apparently I did. Has anyone had any experience with loved ones getting into a rehab and how long it took you?
I'm sorry you are here, but grateful not to be alone.
Boo