Originally Posted by
hopeangel 
thinking that if i was better he "might" be better.
You aren't that powerful.
Originally Posted by
hopeangel i know i also have not met my obligations to the marriage. if anyone understands that.
What obligations have you not met? What obligations has he met?
What happened to that list you did that showed you a while ago that moving out was the right thing for you? (I think that was you at any rate.) What has changed?
I am not trying to tell you to move out. It's not my life ad I sure as heck don't wan to tell you or anyone how to run their life. If you aren't ready,you aren't ready. But if you decide to stay, please do it with your eyes wide open and with an honest understanding of why you are making the decision to stay.