hi serpent--
i grew up with an alcoholic father - the shame and embarrassment were just the worst. I often wonder too if there had been more support- less denial- if AlAteen was available maybe my 3 brothers wouldn't have become alcoholics too...I'll never know.
Naturally your mom would oppose an AlAteen group! But really, it's none of her business! You need that meeting for your own mental health. She's obviously not helping in that department so why shouldn't you take steps to protect yourself and learn about what it is you're REALLY dealing with? Even if you and your friend can't start a local meeting you can get some of AlAteen's literature - it could be very helpful to you.
Welcome to Al-Anon and Alateen
It is NOT your responsibility to hide the truth about your mother for her benefit - she is what she is - if she doesn't want people to know she's an active alcoholic than she could choose sobriety and recovery. That's her choice and her problem, not yours. To get help and educated about alcoholism is your choice and your right.
glad you're here! stick around-- and stay safe--
peace,
b