They certainly teach us to come up with blame, don't they. Blame for situations in which no rational person would think to find someone to blame absolutely.
I'm also a huge fan of Lost, and Ben's dad's drinking habits remind me of something I heard a long time ago. In some families alcoholics have drinking "anniversaries" to sort of celebrate those traumatic times that probably originally kick-started the drinking. I think this has been the case with my AF. Christmases were doomed in my family long before the kids came. When I hear stories of what my AF's Christmases were like, I suppose it's no surprise he tends to go on heavy benders around the holidays. It's too bad he can't see how his drinking has stolen him from holidays with his own family.
It's hard not to feel that it's justice (as opposed to murder) when Ben steals his birthday back - liberating himself from his dad's blame IMO.