Spiked, my AW has been in treatment about a dozen times both inpatient and outpatient. She's out of the house in a sober living home and we a going through mediation for divorce. I too felt that I could not do this! Two dogs, one 15 year old at home and a 19 year old at college. It is hard but it can be done! Knowledge is power so find a good mediator to discuss options for separation or divorce. Alanon is not my cup of tea either but I went to three therapists and found one that has really helped me. I used to stress about the process and financial insanity of divorce but now I see the peace it will bring to my life and it's worth every penny!
Move forward one step at a time....but move!
Good luck!