Re: Adult Children of Alcoholics
Don't feel bad James,
I feel like my whole life was based on lies; the ones that were told to me made me in turn tell lies. #3 seems simple: Quit lying. But the emotional reasons for lying drive me to continue for fear of being alone. That was the biggest lie I was taught. That I would be unloved and unlovable, not ok, left alone if I didn't do things as the family dynamic demanded. It drove me to places I find shocking today. Witholding of love, and the fear of being alone are powerfully manipulative tools. Therapy, Alanon, the 12 step program, and my seeking of spirituality have taught me that I am loved just as I am. They lied. They were probably lied to also, so I don't blame them. But today I know they were wrong. I am rebuilding my life on the truth. So what that it took 36 years to start. At least it started. For my family, it probably never will. So I'm grateful. And I'm grateful for this forum, grateful for all who share here. Hugs, Magic