i havent talked to any doctors. i have my parents home to take care of me tomorrow and i have a few NA numbers to call. im so nervous i cant even fall asleep right now. i am so scared because i dont want to go without that feeling. i totally chicken shitted on my first meeting, went into a panic attack and couldnt drive, my mom was going to go with me. i know i disapointed her because i didnt go and i cant let them down this time with quitting. i really didnt realize what i got myself into til this moment right now when i dont want to go without a damn pill. its pathetic