Originally Posted by
GiveLove 
Welcome to SR, sgroy2003. Glad you found us.
You're familiar with the term enabling?
A classic example is helping an alcoholic to keep getting drunk by chauffering him around "so he doesn't get in trouble." That's protecting him from the consequences of his actions, so he can continue to do what he wants.
I use a lot of soft language on this forum, and try to avoid terms like "Right" and "Wrong." But his daughter is dead right. I'm astonished that he, or you, would tolerate his abusing his daughter in that way. Does she have any choice in this? Who is telling her she has to do it? And why? She should not be responsible for carting around a drunk -- something that NO ONE should be doing anyway.
Where's your confusion in this?
What do you want to do? Is all of this okay with you?
Is this abusive life the one you dreamed of when you were a little girl? Is it doing anyone any good but him?
Hope and strength to you,
I guess the confusion is it is his daughter, not mine. I have protected her as best I could. But when it comes down to it, what he tells her to do she has to do. I could throw and tell him no and I would leave and so forth but in reality I would never leave her there. I can't take her with me and there is no amount of money that could make me leave her there with him. How do I make it at least tolerable for her for the next year and a half until she finishes high school?