YMMV - but for me...
Total non-contact - every time she would find a way to contact me I plugged it.
I sat with my pain, I paid attention to it, felt it, looked at it. A lot of what I felt was fear. I just let go of my fear - besides what is the worst that could happen?
I did not want to race to feel better - I let time (still do) take it's course - I did not want to fast forward thru my life.
I learned to live in only this moment - I found if I did this I was at peace. I clear my mind of anything that keeps me from this moment - because this moment is all I have.
I have also learned to count the wonderful things I have learned about myself during the time I have spent with my XAGF. Try it you are much stronger than you think you are.
I also envisioned her being with someone else - I know this sounds strange but for me I got used to the idea and now I could care less.
Every time I felt like I was going to break down and contact her I did something nice for someone else. I felt good and the person receiving felt good - win/win.
For me I knew that in order to attract the life I really wanted I had to let go of the life (and her) I didn't. I had to make room for something else. If you're standing there in front of a desert table full of wonderful goodies and both of your hands are full of rotting food the only way you're going to be able to eat the goodies is to let go of the rotting food in your hands...
I opened myself up to the possibilities...
This is what worked for me