Cess I hear you on how you feel. We have talked in depth about each of situations and I understand the "I deserve better" and can feel the desire in your post to want more for yourself.
The trap that I am in (I can only speak for myself) is that before my ex got on these pills we had a loving/healthy relationship. I mourn that loss each and everyday and still would be even if he was still living with us. I love the person that he was. Not the person that he is today. I want that feeling of security that I had with him back in my life. That is why I am holding on waiting to see what is gonna happen.
I feel that I am smart enough to see if or when I need to reevaluate my thinking. Today is today and that is all I can see. Today I still very much love him and would like to revisit the relationship provided I can get out of it what I had once before. If that is not possible then I feel that I will be able to move on and be a better person for the future.
I can only speak for my situation and know that this is possible for me today. He has become a drug addict for whatever reason. He didnt leave me for another woman (although some here would hotly debate the doc being the "other" woman) he didnt wake up one day and look at me and tell me he didnt love me anymore. He was stolen from me. By drugs.
There is still hope for him to get well. And maybe in a month I will be posting something competely different but today I will say that yes, I am gonna wait and see how this turns out.
Love to you Cess