Rita
sorry that you are going through this-
I agree with looking into AA and Al-Anon both...I grew up in an Alcoholic home and
was fortunate enough to not become an alcoholic myself. I dated a couple of A's and the last one I dated that actually ended up being my wake up call ....also had an ex wife! He lived with me for a short and we would have his son on the weekends-He would always talk to her and I would cringe! I felt alone, I felt that he would never be done with her! He told her everything about our relationship! I hated it! I use to say to him that he needed only to talk to her about their son! Nope that did not work....I told him to do this, that and the other thing! Nope did not work-Imagine that! I needed to start taking care of me and telling myself what I needed to do or not to do and one was not allowing myself to feel like less than nothing because I was not!
Today I have learned that through the pain there is comfort within ourselves when we believe and trust our instincts! Know that if you are feeling alone as stated above "explore the reasons" why. No one will make us whole but ourselves. It is a hard thing to process and I understand your pain.....but it is possible to get through this to a better place.
My x use to claim I was the love his life too and he could not live without me but the fact remains he could not live with me it was the chaos and drama he could not live without-I no longer need the drama in my life and will not allow it or anyone to make me feel lonely, sad, or miserable!
Please be gentle with yourself-and seek out AA and AL-Anon even for a meeting or two to check it out....IMHO you maybe surprised how much better you may feel!
Keeps us posted you are not alone in this
