It's my Birthday, where's my presents???....
Hello SR Family,
I've kind'a been dreading today! Turning another year older poses many doubts in my mind like, "Can I actually stay sober THIS year"???, "Look at your past, you can't do it"!!! -- and the negative storm moves in and wipes out anything positive with all the "chatter" swirling in my head.
Why is it so easy to offer encouragement to others but have such a hard time believing for myself that I can do this too? That maybe I could have this wonderful life if I could & would just stay sober???... long enough!
Crrraaazzzy! I DO KNOW that not drinking today is the best present I can give myself -- Day 10 -- wooohooo!... now I'm a double digit! I'm actually a pretty positive optimistic person when I'm not boozing it up and do try to see the glass "half full".... but the underlying truth towards myself is not so pretty and hopeful! I'll give "time" - TIME today, Lord knows the clock is ticking.... Have a great day guys and gals!!!
Luv n Hugz,
Nicki:ghug2