herein1985

I found my way to here after a constant back and forth fight to figure things out.

I wouldnt say that i crave a drink although after a crazy week i like to go out with a some friends and have a few drinks. Sometimes we will have a few drinks at each others house or what not.

There have been more than a handful of times over the past 3 years where i have blacked out and done something really embarrassing or something that i regretted. This is the only time i feel like i may have a problem, right after doing something that i feel horrable about while drunk.

I was proud of myself because more recently i have been able to have a beer or two and be fine. I do that for a while and then all of a sudden i do something really out of character which results in me feeling really stupid.

Im not sure what else to say. I am embarrased over a recent situation. Im feeling as i have before, that by saying something i am condeming myself in some way to something that isnt me. But maybe it is.