THANKS FOR SHARING YOUR STORY!!!! My Rah moved out 1.5 month ago. I have thought SOOOOO many times of "what if". What if he can stay clean, what if we can reconcile and live a happy normal life, what if we can be a happy family, what if..... I really needed to hear your story. I would have done the same thing. You can't beat yourself up over this. Others, who have not loved an addict, cannot put themselves in your shoes. You believed in something. I am so sorry for your pain and anger. You will be come out stronger. Now, you can move on. "Let it go". The past is the past.