Sometimes I just feel that it doesnt have to be this way. No I feel that way all the time. I know that him and I were very good together. I know that because of my past abusive relationship that I could not stay when I was no longer feeling like we were equals.
He told me once that he had cheated on me. I looked at him puzzled. He said I cheated on you with drugs. How true that statement is and was. He allowed another to replace me. Things have gotten bad between us now. I dont like it. Because I feel that if this truly were a breakup we could sit down like two rational adults and work out visitations and blah blah.
When he asked what time I was dropping our daughter off for Thanksgiving I was floored. Like I hadnt made plans to do something. Like he was expecting to get his way. I told him that we would be out of town and then the stuff hit the fan. Does he really think I am not gonna move on with my life? I know he thinks his life is on pause (he says that often) but MINE IS NOT!!!!!
Let me just throw something out there and tell me what you think.....
Addicts too go through stages of grief. Denial of their problem. Anger. Depression. Bargining. Resentment. Acceptance.
Is that right? Cause right now he is back and forth between denial and anger. I am NOT responsible for what HE has done. I too want my family back but I cant do that with a person that wont accept his part in all of this.
I just miss him. And sometimes its hard. Thats why I need people like you Cess. It takes my mind off of my own pain and grief and gives me something to direct it at.
Thanks for listening.