Originally Posted by
cassandra2 
So my question is has the drugs changed him mentally so much so that he will be this way forever? Do drugs change you so much that you are never able to get back to who you used to be? He used to have a problem with cocaine/crack a few years ago that is why I suspect he is using something else also but he swears up and down that he isnt and then even makes me feel bad for even suggesting he would do that.
Any help in understanding the nature of this beast would be very helpful. Have I lost this man for good? It seems like he just doesnt give a crap about us anymore.
Thanks
Hi and welcome to SR... You have come to the right place for support.
From your post it looks like your BF is definetly using.
Have the drugs changed him to the point where he will be this way forever? Honestly, thats up to your BF. If he wants to get clean and live a sober life he will. But he has to want to and he will only do it when he is good and ready. There are some awesome recovering addicts on this board with powerful testimony's that are living proof that one can get clean and live a normal life sober.
As for swearing up and down that he isn't using something.. please don't believe a word he says. All addicts lie, it's part of the disease. Addicts can be very manipulative and the disease of addiction will go to great lengths to protect itself.
As for losing him for good, it's hard to say. Like I said before, thats up to him.
I know you love him but unfortunalty all the love in the world will not make someone clean. If it did none of us would be here.
As for understanding the nature of the beast.. I don't know if any one of us can truly understand addiction but the following links have sure helped me put a lot of it into prespective.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ddicts-do.html http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...t-me-fall.html