Hi Staci. Welcome to SR! I am glad you found it. Can you find an AA group or something grouplike that you could get to? You sound like you need to be around other recovering people. Make some friends that don't drink. This addiction is horrendous and having bipolar can't help, but you can do it. Start by not drinking for the next 24 hours. Find a meeting somewhere and go. Get some phone numbers.
I am not in AA, but I believe it works for some and you seem to need friendly, non-judgmental people. We are that here on SR, but I think you might need a friendly smile and the human interaction.
Let us know how you're doing. Thank you very much for sharing your story with us and welcome to SR. :ghug3