Wow – this hits home! Something similar happened to me so let me give some advice about what not to do. I smoked pot and drank 2-3 beers daily when I got married. To make a long story short, we had a few children and began to argue, but we never directed it at the kids.
After 4 years of marriage, she called my parents for a possible intervention about my pot smoking and threatened to call my work. I had an unbelievable job that supported a great lifestyle and I was not willing to give it up. We decided I could not leave my job, so I visited a drug specialist.
Within 45 minutes of our first meeting, this guy decides I’m bipolar and whips out his prescription pad. (I can assure you I’m not bipolar. Everyone that knows me and hears that diagnosis is shocked). He prescribed klonopin and a few other things. That was the beginning of my downward spiral.
Looking back at it, I knew the klonopin was a bad thing, but I didn’t want to quit pot. My addictive personality figured if I was being forced to stop smoking, I needed to replace it with something else.
My point is that I believe it is very difficult for a long term pot smoker that perceives no problems to quit if he doesn’t want to. At least it was for me. Somehow your husband needs to feel he is quitting for the right reasons and by all means, don’t let him replace it with another substance.