Aaaahhh justme. I was a closet drinker too. If my husband "caught" me he would be mad that I was hiding it and drinking out of plastic cups and not a wine glass. And my husband could not keep me stopped or even get me to stop. And of course he has no IDEA what the obsession is like. I have been sober 5 months and I don't think he really gets how extremely long that seems to me! He got quite comfortable with a sober wife pretty quick. He is a normie, to him THIS is normal, and to me it seemed more normal to sneak wine every night.
Does what ever really work? Sobriety? Yup, as long as you are willing to work for it.
You will get all the support you could ever want or need in the rooms of AA. I don't look for too much from my husband because he can not understand it. He supports me going to meetings and he knows that I need it and that it brings me serenity. He has even gotten to the point where he will suggest I go to a meeting or call my sponsor if I am acting squirrely. lol.
A new and beautiful life is waiting for you.
What are you waiting for? :ghug