I agree w/ Freedom-- there's just no healthy communicating with an alcoholic/addict.
Wish- you don't need it to be a "we" go to counseling to learn to communicate better! YOU can go to counseling to learn to communicate better! It will help! Even with him. Once your responses and reactions change, his old tricks won't be in play- once you learn some new communication skills - his old ways of communicating that trigger the worst in you won't work anymore. At least - that's the ideal!!
Work on yourself. Let him quack. Ask a neighbor or family member to help w/ the trees- the less you feel you need to ask of him the better.
Good Luck! Ike actually created a wide swathe of damage - my friend in the land-locked midwest is still without power too!!
Peace-
B.