wish he'd quit

Since I kicked out AH things feel so much better around here. But it has made communicating with him that much harder. I know he is mad that I kicked him out, but his behavior was starting to affect the kids. We never knew if he was comming or going so I told him to go. ANyways.... We live in an area that got the left over winds from Hurricane Ike. We have been with out power since Sunday and have quite a bit of a mess to clean up in the yard. Well I ask him if he is going to stop down and if he could help me with the bigger limbs. His reply to me is that he doesnt feel he should have to since he isnt welcome here and that he will no longer be paying for anything he cant use other than the house payment and my car. This leaves me paying for his insurance and cell phone along with all house hold bills. Then he does the whole speil about "you are getting what you want." SO I tell him "Yep my piece of mind."

I know I shouldnt be sarcastic but thats just the way I am. I often don't realize I'm being that way until after I say something. But I was telling my mom tonight about why he said he wasnt helping. She was like this is rediculous. You both need to go to counseling and figure out a way to communicate. SHe is so right. We went once but AH walked out. I know we need to do something but I dont think he will go back. I think alot of the issue with my parents is that neither understand being in any sort of relationship with an alcoholic and what it entails. They also dont know the extent of the way AH has treated me. My mom actually wanted me to stay with him another 2 years so I could get some of his social security later. Yea I dont think so. Another problem is that AH likes to call while I am out and cause drama. I dont go out often but when I do its always something. I wish I could just sever ties with him, but thats not possible. I know that alot of it is manipulation on his part, as well as my sarcasm. Other than watching what I say, does anyone else have any suggestions for better communication?