Drinking the poison myself, then hoping he dies.
HIP HIP HOORAY.
I've just returned from the 5 day family visit at my son's rehab.
My son is present, progressing in recovery, committed to moving forward, etc.
He has been doing community service and has even discovered a talent for art and working with horses.
He's been selected to go to the rehab's 3rd phase in another state which gives him more independence.
For the first time, my son is one of the ones doing his best.
He had a few opportunities for relapse in the last couple of mos.,
but he declined and called his sponsor instead.
For the first time I am hopeful and excited that he can develop goals for living beyond being a junkie.
As for myself, I need to work on giving up the resentment I have for his dad who is my Ex. He has come to both family weeks, but does not contribute a penny toward the expenses. The family therapy dredges up the memories of the abusive creep he was during the all the yrs. my son was growing up. We split up when my son was only 2 and the Ex was horrible all the remaining yrs.
My son told me when we hold resentments we drink the poison hoping the other person will die. Maybe I will do some 4th step work on resentments,
keeping my focus on what I need to do for my own recovery.
Does anyone have experience with letting go of resentments ??