After decades of unhealthy relationships, I'm still recognizing the signs of living with a healthy one.
Having someone around who's proud of me, and who I hear bragging about me behind my back, when it CAN'T earn him any brownie points with me. Hearing myself brag about him, how honest and funny and fragile he is.
Having someone who's willing to sit down at the kitchen table and figure out what's not working between us, and help figure out a compromise that does work. Being able to say, "Sorry I'm being such a codie; I'll do better next time" and have it be understood without anger.
A relationship in which we can both say, "Hey, you know that thing you did last night? That made me feel really bad and thinking about it kept me up half the night. Can we agree that's something we can avoid doing from now on? (drinking too much, talking to the ex boyfriend in a certain way, staying out too late, etc.)"
Even the things that don't go right have a certain power about them, because when two people love each other more than they love their little habits, there's always the possibility to make it right somehow.
I always thought I would be attracted to losers for the rest of my life.
Getting a taste of something like this, regardless of how long it lasts, has more or less fixed my "picker" forever. I know now I'd be happier single than to ever be in a relationship with someone I couldn't do these things with.